Finding Your Couch Potato Lover Has Left Me With a Whole Bunch of Questions…

Netfling

Oh the bane of having to be sociable. It has been my Achilles heal for as long as I can remember. Okay, fine, to be honest I’ve been a hardcore grumpy grump hermit for the last three and a half years. As I’m sure you’ve gathered, dating hasn’t really been on my social to-do list lately. It’s not that I haven’t tried, it’s just that I miss the old way of how people met. You know, in person. Where they could witness your great personality first hand. Instead of a couple of pictures and some texts through a dating app.

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My Second Favourite ‘F’ word…FRIDAY

Friday Feeling

Pandas, I am so happy that it’s Friday! TGIF man! Whoop whoop! Is that too much love to give over a day? Who cares! I love Fridays!

It is by far the best day of the week. A day full of hopes, enthusiasm and fun. So whatever’s going on in your life take a step back and enjoy the little things in life. This right here is one of my little things. And I take full advantage of the joy that it brings me. So go forth and have fun this evening pandas! You deserve it!

Oh…. I bet you’re wondering what my first favourite F word is. Well, that would be…

FALAFEL

Yes, the food. Don’t laugh! I just think it’s the best sounding word around, almost like the likes of kerfuffle. I like the way it rolls off the tongue. I have even taken to using the word in place of kerfuffle. Like ‘those two are having a falafel’, meaning they’re fighting/arguing. Or ‘stop falafeling around’, meaning stop joking around. I don’t know why I do this. But I guess that’s what makes me, me! Oh alright, you can laugh if you want to.

❤ ❤ ❤

What’s some of your favourite words?

A Casualty of The War On Fat…

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On the 31st of August my pal (who I call Squishy) and I decided to combine forces of encouragement in the hopes of tackling the frustratingly difficult journey of losing weight. We figured the best way would be to motivate each other and share what foods we were eating throughout the day. You know like a keep-each-other-in-check kind of thing. She would be my Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson and I would be her Jason Momoa. We would be motivators, terminators, hulkinators and whatever else kind of -ators we could think of.  After laying out the foundation of our ingenious plan, we decided that the best time to start this magical invigorating quest was on the first of September. Which of course was the next day.

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A Girl’s Guide: To Surviving Sex For The First Time With Someone New

bunny sex relationships

Oh boy… This one’s a doozy isn’t it? It’s quite possibly one of the most awkward, fumbling, tumbling yet exhilarating experiences one will every go through. And unfortunately, it will probably happen each and every time you have sex with someone new. Unless however, you’re uber confident in your skills and your naked body. I however feel pity to those that befall my nakedness because it’s something that their tiny eyeballs can’t unsee.

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The Invisibility Cloak of being Average…

invisibility Cloak

So I just turned 32 a couple of weeks ago and it has started this constant chain of panic and fear that I have yet to achieve anything substantial in life. Thirty two years on this fucking planet and I have been playing below par for three quarters of it. Well, I can’t technically say all the years because I physically don’t remember the first 4-5 of them. Who knows, maybe I was above average in those years like excelling in finger painting, but I somehow highly doubt it.

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Excuse Me While I Go Knock Myself Into A Coma…. Someone’s Invented Clown Contouring. (Insert puke emoji here)

Clown Contouring

Panda’s I just can’t anymore. What in the hell is the world coming to?! Apparently we have now ventured into the era of the Clown. Wasn’t the first contouring makeup tutorial enough for you? Weren’t the hoards of photos and how-to articles enough to satiate your appetites? Apparently not, because now all I see are articles about clown contouring. And everyone and their momma’s are lapping it up. So I simply must ask, when will the madness end?

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